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Saturday, May 2, 2009

Saturday Dance Vids: Unforgivable, Begging, My First, My Last, My Everything

I listen to Dance Factory a LOT out of the Chi. (That's Chicago for the uninitiated.)
Armin van Buuren feat. Jaren - Unforgivable


The mixes are pretty decent. Repetitive. Sometimes whacked. But overall, I can get my blood pumping while missing racoons, skunks, deers and whabbits. One has to, or else, the boring task will overwhelm you - not in thought - but in the fact, you can do more but have to settle (right now) for less.

I do that a LOT too. Settle. There comes a point where you have to risk comfortable mediocrity for unknown successes (or failures.) What do I want and more to the point, what do I value?

We value what we put the most efforts towards. What gets us up and hopeful, not what makes us sad and forgettable and dull.

But most always personal sacrifice and what we are willing to give up in life (family, friendships, status, etc.) is the the caveat to such dreams. Lately, I have pondered signficantly how much can I give up (in my unhappy life) to go elsewhere and do whatever. (Let's say write and eek out a living doing something mundane to pay rent and for food.)

Madcon Frankie Valli - Beggin (Remix)

It is not the basic will to do it. I have that much.

But it's the unknown. I have no real friends. And convicts that move to other places don't get hired easily. (In a deepc recession - likely worse.) Can I find a job and place to stay? Where I want to be?

I believe I have a modicum of ability, but it will take years to complete, or publish anything that could lead to better things. (Even then, it might just be a piped dream.)

But can I leave on a whim? Without resources? That's the deal with me.

While Chicago pumps out that music every night, I want to be in tropics, writing a Ludlum thriller, or John Meacham's American Lion: Andrew Jackson in the White House, winner of the 2009 Pultizer Prize. Undoubtedly, they wanted something different too - at some point. They found subject matter and made it their first, their last, their everything.

You Are The First, My Last, My Everything (Barry White)

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